Emily had begged to go speed dating.  I said there just wasn’t time, which seems a little oxymoron-ish considering speed dating’s whole concept revolves around quick assessments, and rejections, specifically for those individuals that don’t have time.  I like that speed dating seems to have the potential for hilarity, and a good story, two aspects in life that I search out.  My now single BFF likes the adventure and attention of it all.

Batman and Robin Halloween

Saving the world.

Between returning from New Zealand, leaving Hawaii, Halloween in California, and packing my little self away to Florida, we postponed the dating drama.  I didn’t need more sidetracks.  What I needed was to focus, and to feel, both of which I was running far from, craving the numbing of goodbyes, and wanting distractions from the fears that told me none of what I was attempting would work out.  Incessantly, thoughts that I had made a huge mistake transferring out of Honolulu played in my head.  It didn’t help that my water logged, and subsequently non-functional laptop had to be replaced within the same week that I was supposed to buy a car, pay the rest of the rent for my new Ft. Lauderdale home, and move across the world.  Once again, I felt in over my head, and up to my ears, only holding together because the other options seemed worse.  Putting myself back together from a breakdown was something I had no time, energy, or interest in doing.

I’ve been grumpy, edgy, and hard to be around recently.  Thankfully, for her sake, my mom was away on a trip avoiding the worst of it, but my dad, was volunteered for Kara babysitting.  Well, not actually volunteered, but assigned.  Dad’s are supposed to help their little girls buy cars, and take care of things like that.  I also had four bags that needed to be flown from the farmland of California, where much of my life lives, to the East Coast.  I couldn’t do all of this by myself, although I wanted to.

California Almonds

California Almonds at The Farm

Packing and unpacking

Moving across the world disaster

I wanted the process of moving to be fun, but it wasn’t.  I felt engulfed by a cloud.  I knew that it was my attitude, and nothing else that was making the relocation painful.  I’m not making excuses for how I responded, losing the hopefulness I usually feel, but you know when you see ‘impossible,’ and only that?  When you can find no logical way to solve a problem, and all that you feel is the pit that settles?  I was seeing impossible.  You can’t find a car in one day, they said.  Reality was that I didn’t have a day.  I had maybe 14 hours.  Reality was that I had an EXTREMELY tight budget.  The car had to be cheap, but reliable, and of course the girl in me said it had to be cute.  I was asking to accomplish the impossible.  I wished to adopt Sunny, the foreign gem, also known as El Cheapo, that I had driven while in New Zealand.  It was ugly, but endearing.  Full of character, and fun.  My love of foreign apparently runs deep.

Jucy Car Rental Auckland

Meet El Cheapo.  Auckland, New Zealand

I knew the probability of finding a vehicle in one day was nil, but it didn’t seem unnatural that the scenario was playing as such.  My life always happens quickly, and all at once.  It started at birth.  I was two weeks early, wanting to sandwich myself right between Christmas and New Years, because mid-january is boring, right?  This was my first experience buying a vehicle.  I realized that the jokes about used car sales men and used car lots were true, when Dad and pulled up to Modern Auto Sales.  I tried not to smirk as I shook the dealer’s hand.  I wouldn’t buy a car from him.  He was just too, cliche.  Too much the stereotype.  He was probably the type that…I’ll just let your imagination take this one the rest of the way…

Regardless, my outlook that morning had significantly improved when I had found an ice cream truck while browsing Craigslist, preceded by a pink car, deciding that whatever I purchased had to be wrapped with The Flight Attendant Life, turning my wheels into a tax write off.  What a great marketing tool!  I started throwing my ridiculous sense of humor, and far off dreams into the prospect of finding the cutest junk mobile possible.

I had underestimated the expenses involved in moving.  I had misunderstood the timeframe that it usually takes to accomplish a feat like car buying when buying from a private party.  Thankfully, miraculously, we found an adorable, old, rattling, and whining Volvo, that I could afford paying cash for, thereby avoiding monthly car payments (monthly car payments would take away my travel budget, and that is no bueno).  I named her Greta Rose.  She’s not perfect, and already misbehaving.  I’ve already learned that she’s not potty trained- she’s leaking her fluids everywhere!  I say my prayers every time I attempt to turn her on.

Crazy Flight Attendant

A little scary…yes

A phone call had to be made to turn the white, boxy, and angled Greta into an insured vehicle, and me, the insured driver.  Over the phone, I chatted with Adam, he asking me, what I assumed to be, the typical questions insurance agents are required to ask of potential insurees.  What is your name?  What is your birthdate?  Social security number, address, and marital status?  The relationship status question was what began my laughter.  “Adam! This is like a Speed Date! I’ve never actually been on a speed date, yet, but these are very intense, get-to-know-you questions.  You know so much about me already!”  I think that he was a little thrown off by our new first date status.  Stuttering, he said, “Well, wow…no one has ever said that before.” I’m not surprised that any of his other at work, phone conversations hadn’t went to the topic of speed dating.  Who, but me, would tell the man about to quote me my insurance rate that this it felt like an awkwardly weird, set-up?  I’m simply just ridiculous.  He asked me what I did for a living.  “Seriously Adam!  These questions are intrusive!”  When he took my credit card information, he made sure to remind me that I shouldn’t give this information out on a real date.  Yes. Yes, I know.

At the end of the conversation, by law he was required to read me a verbal statement, and I had to say, “I [Full Name here] agree to…blah, blah, blah.  It was a long statement that he read.  Tt was the ending of that statement, where I repeated that I agreed to the terms and conditions in an “I do,” format, that had us both laughing, and me saying, that this got serious, real fast.  And, if that wasn’t weird enough, after we finished our insurance vows, Dad asked to talk to my ‘Insurance Soulmate’

Before hanging up, I made sure to find out some important information about him.  It was only fair considering he knew that I was a single, flight attendant, who had just moved to Florida, and was the new owner of an old Volvo.

I found out his favorite color is green.

I’ll pick you up in my new, sweet ride….Hey, Boy, HEEEEEEEYYYY!!!!

Volvo S70

About the Author

Hello, I’m K. J. Watts, but my friends call me Kara. I fell into the sky and have worked as International cabin crew, on private jets as a corporate flight attendant, and earned an FAA Private Pilot Certificate. Over a decade ago, I started this blog, which developed into a love for writing and a debut memoir based on Flight Attendant Life. A California native, I now live in Sydney, Australia, where I enjoy spending time with my husband, writing, and surfing.

  1. This was your best post yet Kara! I was cracking up reading your “insurance date”. Miss you much my friend!

    Dave

Comments are closed.

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}