Dear Passenger: I’m sorry I am a bitch today. Love, Your Flight Attendant


Dear Passenger,

I’d like to honestly say that it was nice to see you today, but really, I could have gone without the introduction.  It’s not your fault.  I know you are here to fly, and I know I am here for you, but today, I am struggling.  My patience is nonexistent, and I am so tired.  I realize that this is not your problem.  I see that your focus needs to be how your luggage will fit in the overhead locker, and no, I cannot not lift that bag for you.  Yeah…today you and I are not off to a great start.

I know that I am supposed to be bubbly, smily, cute, and so happy to be on this plane, but you are the fifth flight full of persons that I have seen today, and I want no more of this ‘Can of Pringles in the Sky.’  It’s not you, it’s me.  For the record, I don’t like Pringles, and if I hear ONE more call light pressed so that I can pick up your trash or because you didn’t bring games for your child to play, I may pop!  “That button is not a toy!”

It was supposed to be my day off actually, but scheduling lassoed me in.  They tend to do that and unfortunately you are the one that suffers.  I suffer too, if that’s any consolation.  If my smile is strained, it’s not because you are the 20th person who has asked me, “What do you have to drink?”  Although I find this question annoying by now, because most people in this century can read picture menus, I understand everyone has an off-day.  I really wish I had one of those right now as I need a vacation.  I proceed to tell you that we are out of chicken and you throw a fit.  Your off-day has turned into a bad day.  Join the club.

I truly am forcing one of the most genuine grins that I can muster.  This takes practice, and I have a lot of smile forcing practice.  I only got three hours of sleep last night, and it’s not because I was out partying.  Oh how I wish.   I live an all-the-time jet lagged life, and it hurts both of us.  It hurts my health and it hurts your positive travel experience.  Oh yeah, I have also been subsisting on chocolate candy bars and coffee all day.  This is not healthy.  Do not do live like this.

I hope you will forgive me for not being the image of a perfect flight attendant today.  I am about 90 percent sure that I will have a chance to redeem myself, probably in twenty more minutes when I enter round six and see the next group of passengers.

Happy flying and many apologies,

Your Lovely Flight Attendant

Dreamliner 787 Boeing Airplane

About the Author Kara

Curious. Bubbly. Creative. Curating a life I don't need an escape from and inspiring you to do the same.

follow me on:
Pamela Adamson says March 7, 2015

You have put on a otherwise frownie face.

Precious says March 16, 2015

Oh my , I often have days like this and feel so guilty at the end of a flight for not giving my best smile and being genuenly nice to passengers , which is what I pride myself on ( it’s been even more difficult now that I fly the largest passenger plane in the world) fixing the smile can become difficult after the 400th person. . Its great to know that someone else feels this way.

Love the way you wrote this so create. Love your blog.

sara says July 1, 2015

By reading ur blog I felt really good cause I’m a flight attendant too, and realized that it’s not only me who sometimes feels fatigue and exhausted when flying and it’s just something common about us ☺

Comments are closed